That's A Nice Coat

That's A Nice Coat is the title of the first episode of D&D Is For Nerds Vol. 1, a 3.5 D&D Is For Nerds adventure. It features Adam "Crabapple" as the Dungeon Master. This episode was released on 12th July, 2015. The introductory soundbite is "Sanspants radio; chimera? I hardly know her!" spoken by Jackson Baly.

Players & Their Characters

 * Alli Kathleen as Princess Ansley Foggyfeather, Human Ranger class
 * Jackson Baly as Krifpum Pumkrif, Half-Elf Wizard class, with Jiggalump the cat
 * Joel Zammit as Leo Shadow, Halfling Rogue class

NPCs

 * Bartender
 * Dusty traveller in a big brown overcoat
 * Wandering Norton (mentioned)

Locations

 * Edgegate
 * A tavern in Edgegate populated by farm-folk
 * Wandering Norton's lair (mentioned)

Plot
In this episode, the three sellswords sit in a seedy tavern in Edgegate. Krifpum asks the bartender for a shower, then scurries back to the others after rejection. Upon learning that the party has money, Jackson takes 15 gold back to the bartender. Leo hoists himself up to the bar and asks for some of the money back, failing.

The dusty traveller enters the tavern, and gains the attention of the bartender immediately. Krifpum casts Dancing Lights, encapsulating the crowd, then begins to dance (poorly) on the table. Thanks to his distraction, Leo successfully steals the 15 gold back from behind the counter, then Krifpum continues to dance upon the table (worse).

Ansley sneaks up to the bartender, hidden, and hears their conversation, discussing the party's incompetence. Ansley tries to "pinch his butt" and is caught. She stutters over her words, and her "womanly charm" has no effect on him. Upon discerning that Leo and Krif are part of her party, he proposes selling something to them. From his waistcoat he pulls a scroll, and asks them if they're aware of a wizard named Wandering Norton; Krif is familiar with the family, and aware of a local "dungeon" in which Wandering Norton specialises in alchemy. The man taps his scroll case and offers to sell the party the plans for the first level of the dungeon for 20 gold; Ansley's immediate rebuttal is 4 gold, and then offers 4.5 gold, then 67 gold, then back to 4 gold. Krif offers 15 gold and a block of wood.

The man finds this all rather amusing and brings his price down to 18 gold. Leo attempts to negotiate more than the scroll; not a separate scroll that would enable the party to pass a trap, but the man's jacket, for 20 gold. The man points out some traps on the map, and directs the group to the alchemy lab. He leaves and Leo attempts to pickpocket another scroll from him - the wrong pocket - but doesn't find anything.

Krif mounts a table again and attempts to pawn off the coat. Someone offers 6cp. No-one is interested. The party sells it, then sets off on foot. As they leave the town, nothing eventful happens. Krif and Ansley bathe in a fountain, during which a member of the town guard approaches - raises a hand - then walks away.

Quotes

 * "Oh my god, is that dragon leather?" - Leo
 * "Thoroughly scrubbed, we chuff off." - Jackson

Trivia

 * Krifpum Pumkrif backwards is firkmuP mupfirK.
 * According to D&D 3.5 custom, 15 gold would afford 20 nights' stay in common conditions for the whole party.
 * In the introductory soundbite, Jackson's pronunciation of 'chimera' is incorrect.